Ringing in the New Year

It's been a while since I've written in this blog. To be honest, I haven't decided yet if this is something that I can commit to. I have a bit of a discipline problem and this is one of it's victims.

I just got back from Monterey, CA, where I spent Christmas with my mother's side of the family. I had a terrific time for the most part, spent some quality time with my family, and only took part in a couple of arguments (my family members are all very...how shall I call it? Opinionated?

Anyway, as the New Year is approaching, I can't help but think of the many things that I need to do to regain control over my life. I've always felt like I've been on autopilot and lately I've been disappointed in myself for not taking the reins of my own life and doing with it what I truly want. So 2009 is the year...for starters, my resolutions:

1) Create a budget (and TRY to stick to it)
2) Cut my credit card debt (no more adding to it)
3) Lose 10 lbs by the summer (ideally 15, but...baby steps)
4) Figure out what to do career wise, and if that means find a new job, then so be it
5) Get a hobby (ie. stop being so lazy!)
6) Learn discipline!

Well, that's it, for starters. Sometimes I think I havent quite accepted that I'm an adult...and at 27, I'm starting to run out of excuses.

Cheers to the New Year!

October 10 - here I come!

Well, the days are getting shorter, the breeze cooler. I have to say, as much as I am a bonafide beach bum, I cant help but like this slow transition period before the fall. I just wish I could enjoy it a bit more.

I feel like I've been going non stop and I can't seem to catch up on weekends. The beginning of the month was exhausting with back-to-back trips to Montreal (to see my bro) and to nyc for an awsome, but oh-so-short reunion with some of my oldest friends.

I'm so looking forward to October 10th. Getting on that plane and flying to Paris is all I've been looking forward to for ages!! I'm SO excited. I'm going to see some of my oldest friends from the Philippines, including one that I havent seen for about 10years!

After a couple of days in Paris, the boy and I will be driving down through the Loire Valley, stopping in Blois and Amboise to visit the surrounding castles. I've been dying to do this for ages!!

Then I get to go visit my grandma - I havent seen her in about 3 years and I definately owe her this visit. She lives all by herself and I should be better at visiting her...especially given her age.

We'll end our trip in Germany, visiting the my boy's "family" - very old friends in Wurzburg.

Definately not enough time to do all we want to do, but I'm so glad that we are getting a chance to take some time off for us!

Yay!

Stressed

I'm so stressed - and when I'm stressed, I can't function. So you can imagine how awful work has been this last couple of weeks.

All I can do is think of escaping - which is generally what happens when I start to feel this way.

I'm off to Montreal for Labor Day! I'm so excited, I'm going to get to see my brother whom I haven't seen since Xmas. It's one of my favorite cities in the world. In fact, I would live there in a second if it wasn't so frigid during the winter months. It's a piece of Europe in the North America. I hear Quebec City is even better, but I haven't had a chance to get up there.

Anyway, its crazy, I leave on saturday morning, which should feel like soon, but all I see between now and then is more work than I have time to do! YUCK!

On loss and life

8 days ago, one of my closest friends passed away. She was 27 years old. I am still in shock...Its the strangest thing, realizing your mortality and that of our loved ones so early on in life. She wasn't sick, she had a brain aneurysm. And that was that. No time to plan for it, no time to ready yourself for the loss -- she was just gone, from one day to the next.
Life is a little bit duller.
And yet, we've had beautiful days the last couple of days here. When I look outside the window, I see everyone going about their day as though this huge loss didnt happen. Thats when I realize how small we all are in this big world and how little we know about those around us. How many times have I sat next to someone in the metro without knowing they were suffering the agony of having lost someone close to them.
We all need to start caring more, as a people. We all need to let those we love know how much they mean to us, because no one knows how long they will be in our lives. Nor do we know how long we will be in ours.
And stop smoking -- its one of the causes of brain aneurysms, and its just stupid.

On budgets

I really need to create a budget. I'm a shopaholic, I can't deny it, and I love eating out....and I have no discipline.

Ugh...how can I motivate to actually create a budget (which in and of itself seems exhausting to me) and then actually stick to it.

My problem is that no matter what is on my budget, I'll still buy plane tickets that I can't afford ... and shoes that i can't afford ... and well...pretty much everything else that I want that I can't afford.

I'm doomed.

On Jobs, Friends and Moving

One of my oldest and dearest friends has just accepted a job in the US! She lives in France right now, and we haven't lived in the same country since we were 17 years old!! Its been 10 years!

She is moving to Hoboken, or Manhatten, depending on where she decides she wants to live (her office will be in Hoboken).

Of course, it's just my luck, as I'm deciding to move to the West Coast, she decides to move to the East Coast. Lucky for me though, she is arriving in October, and if all goes according to plan, I won't be moving to San Fran until next year around this time.

Speaking of...

I think I found the company I want to work for. I actually even found a job that I think would be a great fit for me. Unfortunately, I'm a year early in my job search. What should I do? I think I will start searching in earnest around Spring '09. Since I'm sure it will take both the boy and I a while to find jobs.

Oh the dilemma!

To Paris with Love....

I've always had a strange love affair with France. For one. Its my country. I was raised a proper french girl, in a proper French School (though in the Philippines) where I learned proper British English (I still spell colour the british way). However, I've never lived in France for more than a few weeks at a time.

I've spent the last 9 years of my life living in North America. When I first moved to the States when I was 18, I had never identified with being American (my mother is american). People noticed that, although I had an american accent, I didnt quite...fit in.

Like I said, its been 9 years, 7 in the States, 2 in Vancouver and I must say, I now fit in just fine...except for my nagging urge to move ALL THE TIME.

A friend of mine that I've known since we were about 2 years old, who now lives in Hong Kong, is about to move back to Paris. She and I went to the french school together, and instead of going to college in the States like I did, she chose to go to France. I cant help but feel a pang of jelousy. Not just because she is moving to Paris...but because she chose the European and international route when we graduated high school, while I chose the US route.

I dont regret it per se. Its just that I always wanted to be an expat, live in Europe and Asia...I never planned on staying here longer than the 4 years of college...and yet here I am.

Not sure where this rant is going. I suppose I cant help but think a lot lately about the choices I've made in my life, and whether or not they were the right ones.

A triumphant return....to France

I cannot even begin to describe how excited I am about my pending trip to Europe.

Until 2005, I was lucky enough to spend time in France (and by default many other countries) every year. Every summer, after visiting my American side of the family in California, I would head over to France to see my dad's side of the family. Through college I made sure to either have internships, or educational opportunities in Europe.

Unfortunately, now that I am out of grad school, I dont have the money (or the time) to be jetting off to Europe for weeks on end.

Anyway...I'm babbling. The point is, the boyfriend and I are planning a triumphant return. Paris, the Loire Valley castles, La Vallade (middle of nowhere countryside where my grams lives) and Wurzburg (where the boy has old family friends).

Oddly enough, I have never seen the casles of the Loire (and if I did, I was way too young to remember!) I am SO excited!!! I love history, and being able to see Amboise and Chambord will be glorious indeed.

We may even throw in a champagne tour...mmm

Oh, but I get ahead of myself...first buy plane tickets...

Thoughts on friendship, love and relationships

It's a frustrating thing, when you have to watch your friend make stupid decisions. Don't get me wrong, I've made those very decisions myself - trusting people I shouldn't have trusted, letting myself be walked over and cheated on in relationships.

What I dont understand, is why come to me for advice and to vent, if you wont heed the advice that I have to give. Now I'm one of those people who believes that being a friend does not mean agreeing with everything your friend says and does, but rather, it means being the one person who can say: "you are wrong."

The particular friend in question, is in a destructive relationship, that she needs to get out of. I understand that it is hard to break up with someone you love... but lately I've come to realize that love... is actually a rather unoriginal thing.

If you think about it, every relationship (love or not) ends, until you get married...and even then some of those end. But after every failed relationship comes another relationship and so on and so forth. We humans are stronger emotionally than we let ourselves believe. So yes, break ups hurt, but in time, you heal and you fall in love again.

And the cycle continues...

Some people say im cynical...or bitter because of my lack of belief in "the one". I disagree, I believe we have soulmates yes, but I dont believe that there is one person on the planet that we are meant to be with.

July

This month is starting out rather nicely on the social front...and quite stressful on the job front.

I just enjoyed a lovely 4th of July weekend on the Cape with my best friend. Her family owns a house there and they are all happy and merry people. Whenever I am in a down mood, the best thing I can possibly do is hang out with her. Unfortunately, we dont live in the same state, and neither of us have the time or the money to visit eachother more often, but getaways like these are always treasured.

As for work...ugh. I dont even know where to begin with how stressed I am about it. I've determined that I am in the wrong career. I'm thinking of trying to move into Corporate Social Responsibility...but its hard trying to decide when the right time to start looking is...

Blah...

Viva Espana

I've been in a soccer frenzy these days. I love soccer. It can't be helped, its the European half of me. However, I tend to get involved only in Eurocup and Worldcup as I find it too much of a commitment to follow my favorite leagues during the regular season.

As it is, the Eurocup 2008 final is on sunday!! AHHH!!!

I have to say, I was very upset that Turkey lost against Germany, they deserved to win. Not only have they been a better team in this competition, but I truly believe it would be been a momentous occasion for Turkey to WIN the EuroCup when so many Europeans dont think Turkey is "european" enough to join the EU.

Unfortunately the Germans beat them (snif snif). BUT the good news is that Spain made it to the finals, a solid team, they killed the Russians and hopefully they will do the same for Germany.

Its not that I have anything against Germany. Au contraire, I have many ties to the country and to its people, but truth be told, I identify more with Spain, people are much more laid back, and I like Fabregas' style.

The only team I dont like is Italy, and that goes back to the France/Italy rivalry...I still havent gotten over our World Cup loss, and I still worship Zidane, even if he did lose the damn cup.

And so it is. In honor of soccer, this sunday, I will first be watching a DC United - LA Galaxy game (my first MLS game!) and then promptly rushing to the nearest location showing the Eurocup final!

GO SPAIN!

Dreaming of San Fran

So lately I've been on this huge "move to the west coast" kick that I just can't seem to kick.

Anyone who knows me is well aware of the fact that I have a wandering soul. I can't seem to settle anywhere and within about 2 years I get ansy and start planning my next step.

Well, its been over 2 years that I've been in DC and I'm SO ready to move. Now the long term plan has always been to hope over the pond, make a move to Europe and maybe even Asia. I'm blessed in that I have a boyfriend who is very supportive of my "need to be an expat" issue and has also been bitten by the travel bug.

Nevertheless, making the decision to move is a big one. I've now convinced myself that it must happen next year :) 2009 seems like a good year to move doesnt it?

San Francisco has always been one of my favorite cities. I've spent time there pretty much every summer of my life, but have never been lucky enough to live there. I think it would be a great place to spend a couple of years before moving to another country! Its near the beach, near mountains (for my boy who loves skiing) and near my family (which is gong to be a first for me, I've never lived near family)

So here I am...consumed by this NEED to move. I'm curious to see what happens. Until then, I'll just daydream of eating those yummy mini donuts on the wharf...oooh and the yummy french cafe in union square...

Charity: Water

So today, I've been reading up on Charity: Water. I watched an increadible PSA on this organization about a month ago that moved me quite deeply: http://www.charitywater.org/public_service/play.htm

I have always been deeply committed to development, especially having grown up in the Philippines and been exposed to income inequality the likes of which one does not see in the States, where I live now. I like to believe that we are all connected, in some way, and as such, it is our duty to do what we can to help those who have not been as lucky as I have been.

There are thousands upon thousands of non-profits and charities out there, but every once in a while, one stands out among the many. Charity: Water is one of them.

1.1 billion people in the world don't have access to clean water. Think about it.

Friday the 13th

I've been debating what to actually put in my blog for months now since I subscribed to it. I find that I have thoughts running through my head a mile a minute and this would be a great outlet for me to purge. Of course then I come up with a million and one reasons why I shouldnt have a blog, namely, my laziness, and the complete randomness of my thoughts.
But...today is the day I decided to start.

I've decided to keep this blog somewhat anonymous. Anyone who knows me would probably figure out right away who I am. As I am a rather private person, I might as well keep my name private.

When I started this blog, it was meant to focus mainly on my passion for travel. However, given the fact that I am rarely able to stick to one thought at a time, I think this blog with be a combination of travel, politics, shopping, personal finance and whatever else crosses my mind.

Enjoy!